This, in my opinion, is the second most important of the Foundation Four Self-Care in Recovery . Our minds take almost the biggest hit when we are in active addiction or suffering from an illness. It doesn’t matter if you’re a drinker, druggie, or self-harmed; guaranteed your mind has gotten some very overwhelming damage. So when we are doing DAILY self-care it is important to remember our mind and emotions. There isn’t a day that I don’t have to Reset & Refocus my mind to better myself for the day ahead or from the day that just ended. See, on some days I have to double down on this step and practice in the morning and in the evening.
Emotional | Reset and Refocus
What can you do to Reset & Refocus? Unclutter that brain of yours! Release the emotions that you felt, address the worries you have, and understand that it is okay to feel the way your feeling. Our emotions can get us into trouble and cause us to do the unthinkable. So focus when you are practicing this and don’t try to do what works for someone else. You have to find what works for you. Keep a journal and write about what you have going on inside emotionally, describe what these emotions are making you feel and how it changes your train of thoughts, what fears to do you have? Affirmations and mediation are a life saver at times and can help us to begin to change the way we see life in general. As well, it can help us to learn and understand our emotions. Take the time to Reset your emotions by getting whatever you are feeling out of your mind and into the world. By this I mean write them down, record a video, talk to a trusted friend or therapist/coach, or simply say them out loud. Keeping our emotions inside can do more harm to us than if we let them be spoken.
Once you have Reset then you need to Refocus and get yourself back inline with your goals, routine, and choices. Know where you are in your life that day and what you have to do to make sure you stay on track. We have to stay focused on the task or items’ at hand to be able to be successful. Write down your goals for the day and add a note on the side on how you are going to get that goal done. Don’t overload yourself with goals or task. Keep it simple. Keep it focused. Remind yourself why you are doing the things you are doing, so that you can Refocus on your life one day at a time.
Our emotional damage that happens during the dark days often can leave us wrecked for years to come. Most of the time recovering addicts or those trying to heal from mental illness don’t allow themselves to feel the emotions that come with getting better. Like when they were using or struggling, they try to find a way of numbing or hiding their emotions only in a more rational way. But that is not a good idea at all and here’s why.
Hiding or numbing our emotions is what we were trying to do during the dark days. We did that by some sort of chemical- mind- altering- substance or “checking out” medication and thus lead us to total destruction of our lives. Now, how can on think it can be rational to hide or numb your emotions at all after that statement? Well, I’ll tell ya. It’s not! Like when we are trying to find the pieces of our souls, we need to embrace the emotions that we are currently feeling. Some days this will be easy because we will have something good happen or accomplish a goal of some sort and the emotions with that are good and beautiful. However, let’s face it. Not every day will our emotions going to be good and beautiful. There will be days that we cry for reasons that only we know, days that we are angry and just don’t want to deal with anyone, or days that all we can do is FEEL EVERY SINGLE BIT OF THE CONSEQUENCES OF OUR PAST ACTIONS! Since we are trying to live a healthy life we at times will try to find a “rational” way to hide or numb these feelings or emotions. But our foundation of recovery should not be to hide or numb anything any longer; that is how we will break our addictions and illnesses. We have to face our emotions one at a time and learn what helps us through those emotions in a healthy way.
So taking time each day to Reset your emotions and then Refocus your mind will allow you to create a habit of embracing what happens whether good or bad and then striving on to live your life healthy and mentally stable. Because if we cannot control our emotions than we will be subject to fall back into the darkness and lose all that we have worked for or all that we will have through recovery.
On the days that it is harder, don’t allow yourself to be alone. Find someone you can trust or find someone who will just hold you and let you be you facing whatever it is your feeling. Remember to find what makes you happy and allow yourself to feel no matter what that emotion is, because so long as you want to live a good life you will be able to. But you have to take time daily to Reset and Refocus your emotions. Some may need to turn up the radio in the car and cry! Some may need to put on their boots and hit the woods and scream at the top of their lungs. Or maybe they might need to go to church and cry out to God and find peace. However, it is that you face your emotions is up to you but it is most important to face them daily.
There is no hiding.
There is no running.
There is no numbing.
So Reset your emotions and Refocus your mind.
That is all for now.