I follow many different blogs and I find it super refreshing when I find one that is in the niche of sober living. There are not many of us bloggers that will be open and honest about the life we were living before we got sober, but I do believe I have found my idol in the bloggers world. Her name is Adriana Kupresakand not only is she beautiful but she is real and raw and honest about her time as an alcoholic and how it destroyed her life. She talk’s deeply about her battle with men as well and the terribly difficult times she had in her past relationships. Adriana will hit the 3 year mark of being sober come September 11, 2019 and she lives such a beautiful and glamorous life; all without the drugs or booze!
I emailed Adriana and asked her if she would so kindly do a quick Q & A with me so that I could share more about her here on Sober Soul and she agree! Now, I know you guys will love her! She is the sweetest and incredibly real. I can’t wait to share with you what she and I talked about. So keep an eye out for her Guest Blogger post and be sure to show her some love once it’s live!
Well, that is all for now!
*all images copyright Adriana Kupresak & her team.
Today my friends is a bit harder than some. You see, most day’s I can control my emotions. I don’t allow them to control me or overwhelm me because once I do I know I am subject to a setback. I am making progress though because today I have let myself run with my emotions but not set back too much.
Emotionally I’m screwed up today.
I’ve felt lonely. I’ve cried without immediate reason. I’ve thought to much on what I don’t have. Tears, frustration, anger,doubt, & sadness has overfilled me today.
This is the shit I don’t like!
Because understand what I am saying when I feel these emotions. I hit my knee’s out of nowhere because I can’t breath from crying. I feel a tightening in my chest because I literally become aware of my children absence in my life both physically and emotionally. I get snappy with someone I love because I am frustrated that I am not already at the point of being able to see or talk to the kids. I tell myself over and over out loud how STUPID I was messing up our lives over drugs and insane chaos. I feel a pressing cloud of anxiety because I start to doubt myself and where I can go and what I can achieve because the emotions are consuming me. I can’t even look at a picture of them and be happy. Because sadness has taken over me completely. THEY are my happiness but on days like today I am so aware that my happiness is NOWHERE near me or my life and I can’t take it.
I just need these emotions to pass! I am almost 100 days sober! I have a good job, a place of my own, a truck of my own, money in my bank account, my health, someone who loves me and supports me, family that is there for me every step of the way, & a God above that has blessed me, especially here lately.
Life is coming together.
Life is progressing along .
Life isn’t being completely unfair to me.
Life is worth living again.
Life is moving in the direction I need it to so that I can be a great mom to my kids.
Life is recovering for me.
These are my reminders that I can and HAVE TO MAKE IT THROUGH THESE EMOTIONALLY DIFFICULT TIMES!
I have to keep moving forward to make it back to my children. I can’t be broken and half dazed. No, I have to be completely healed and rejuvenated when I see them next.
So that’s why I come here and I share. Because somehow me writing these words help me by the time I hit publish. I don’t know why but I have to come here and push, push,push these buttons so that I can figure out a way and why I have to push, push, push through life!
Hello all! I do hope your doing good and had a wonderfully safe weekend! For me it was long & eventful. But I have good news updates and some very exciting things to share.
Last week, I landed myself a JOB! After weeks of countless applications & interviews I was hired on at the wonderful Summerplace Inn Destin! It is a beautiful 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟 hotel and I’ll be working at the front desk. My pay is great and I’ll be able to move up quickly. Not to mention the cruise they send their employees on! Anyhow, I start TODAY! I’m super excited. My boss Jen is the sweetest!
Yours truly at my interview!
I’m proud to say that TJ got himself a fan-friggin-tastic JOB too! He’s going into his 2nd full week now. Lucky guy gets to waterproof buildings right on the beach! Congrats babes I’m so proud of you. 💞 The weekend was long. Sunday April 14th was my baby brothers birthday! He turned 30! Happy Birthday Matty! Also, Sunday was my youngest daughters birthday! She turned 7! Happy birthday Jaylynn Taylor! I love you Pookie! It was to no avail to even try and wish her a good birthday. J wouldn’t answer my text or my phone call but I did leave a VM solely to Pookie. Now, Alyssa is next. Hers is on the 25th of this month. She will be 9!
You know this shit is hard to do sober! But I do and that is what keeps me going. I have found strength in my weakness you guys! I have decided to start doing some video’s! Just me and the camera and my thoughts. I’m still going to write but this way I can talk to my kids too! Anyhow, I’m super nervous to share the 1st 2 video’s but I’m gonna! I didn’t edit them (im still learning) and I am definitely just raw AF in it! Now, you can get a Lil bit closer to me! I hope you’ll watch them, comment, subscribe & as always share!
So I’ve went on this lil adventure to visit some people that I really needed to see. And I really needed to do this because in ways I felt like I needed it to help me find myself again. The past few years have been pure hell and to be honest I lost so much of who I am. I forgot to have fun and love life because I lost my children and all the life & joy went out of me.
But as I have been developing my relationship with God I feel like he had led me to people & places I needd to be. I have to learn to be happy (ish) with me so I can be happy again when I am reunited with my children. So I have embraced the new adventures & wanted to share with you a bit of the fun. I’m working on putting together more of the pictures but here is a few from the very first Casino I ever stepped foot into. Choctaw Casino & Resort was so much fun! I didnt win a thing! Haha! 😋
However, the experience was wonderful. This place was full of bright lights & loud machines of people winning all around me. I had to light a cigarette or two to keep my feelings in check because I was nervous and anxious about it all at the same time! We don’t have Casino’s in Alabama so you can say that I was utterly excited.
I met this woman “Maya” who was way beyond tipsy who taught me how to make my 36cents play right on out for about an hour! She showed me the ropes of the penny machine! Ha! I loved it! There was much fun in the few extra spins I won.
So anyways, here are a few photos I snapped and thought I’d share! I’d love to see any y’all have or tips on how to hit the slots because I’m definitely going back!